Imagine a relationship between two people as solutions to two equations – the equations being the people. And the “variables” that make up the equations – let’s consider them to be the different qualities/attributes/thoughts that make up the people involved..
As an example say there are two “people” namely
2y + 3z + x = 9 and
7y – 2z – x = 2
Let y, z and x be three of the qualities that make up these two “people”
Finding the values/solution to the equations presents you with a set of constants that lend perfect harmony to the equations 🙂
The solution – these constants are the points upon which both the equations [or individuals] agree no matter what.
They are the points where the equations intersect and become one and the same… This is the apex of harmony – in thoughts and in values.
So far so good.
But the characteristics of human beings offer an almost infinite number of variables to their being.
Thus while some of these variables find a matching constancy between the two individuals, some might not.
As time goes on, more and more variables might begin to show up.
Or some might disappear!
But no matter, no matter… No problems as long as the individuals have what is called MUTUAL UNDERSTANDING between themselves.
Mutual understanding is knowing what value a variable would have even before the complete solution is found.
It provides you with initial values to some of the variables.
For example if you knew the value of ‘x’ to be 1 in the above two equations, you can solve them to find the values of ‘y’ and ‘z’ easily to satisfy the equations! This is so nice 🙂
So that the remaining variables can be worked out using these values (this mutual understanding) as a BASE – And herein lies the sheer beauty of it in all its glory!
Unfortunately however, if you imagine people as equations there is one MAJOR glitch.
Human beings have the capacity of being able to influence one another. It’s like a quirk almost. And a rather irritating one at that!
So if you add equations to a defined problem-space, they will influence one another.
If there are ‘n’ equations at a given instant in the problem space then, the two equations in question can be influenced by the remaining (n-2) equations!
This causes new variables to abruptly pop-up between the two equtions or may even change the initial solution values [mutual understanding – the value of the variable ‘x’].
And this is really unfortunate… 😦
All of a sudden you find the beautiful partial solution unable to satisfy the two equations… That too for no fault of their’s… 😦
Sometimes this can skew the two equations themselves so badly that there won’t be a solution after all..
And it’s a given that any ambiguities/assumptions are bound to create further problems (like assuming x = 5 after being influenced by other equation(s)). NEVER ever assume things in relationships.
The bottomline – never let other people change the understanding you have with someone. Do this much and you shall have a beautiful and harmonious relation your whole life.. Simple isn’t it? 🙂